Help! Although I felt I was bonding with my eldest SD before teenage years, that all changed at 13 when the hormones kicked in - she clearly has a lot of struggles and things on her mind, including her gender identify (is now none binary), anxiety and self harm.
A few months ago she said she wasn't happy at our house, we made a couple of changes at her suggestion but didn't really get to the bottom of what was wrong. Yesterday out of the blue she told my partner that she couldn't tolerate me and unfortunately I overheard.She doesn't feel comfortable around me and can't be herself. Ive tried so hard with her and her sister but get nothing back. I don't discipline as leave that to their dad and don't even ask them to do anything, I'm friendly and try to show an interest in them, but because we haven't I also feel uncomfortable around them and anxious before and during their visits. They spend most of their time in their rooms so how can I build a relationship with them? She can't tell me what it is she doesn't like about me, what I'm doing wrong or what I can do differently.
We are going on holiday on Friday and I don't know how to be around her, how do I survive a week together in the car and a holiday cottage with someone who doesn't like me, I'm walking in egg shells hooking she doesn't turn around to say she doesn't want to come to our house any more as that would break my partner 😢 I sometimes think it would easier for me to just walk away from the relationship but I love him and don't want any more disruption for my little boy